Until January

It’s a beautiful spring day. The sun is warm and the sky a soft blue, corrugated by widely spaced clouds. As I do most mornings, I went for a walk to get some exercise.

In recent times, I’ve been going further and in unfamiliar directions. It has surprised me that it’s taken so long to properly explore the extended neighbourhood, but I guess there have been extenuating circumstances.

Today I walked as far as Royal Melbourne Golf Course. The borders of the course are relatively close by – perhaps a 15-minute walk. The streets around the course are full of lovely homes with little traffic passing through. There are trees everywhere and people walking dogs, and it seems a tranquil place to live – and a charming place to walk through.

Peering at the houses as I walked by, I was reminded of the neighbourhood where I grew up. Though quite different in ways, there was a similar feel to it. I felt a kind of regret that I had given that up – though lost, it seems more apt. And, as often, it spurred me on. Don’t give up on it, H!

I’m in an odd space right now, a sort of limbo. The cancer is gone, and generally, I’m much fitter than I was. There are still issues to deal with, and I’ve actually been in more pain lately than previously, but it feels like I’ve got a handle on it. I may even have a dog soon. I’m not in the next stage yet, but it’s probably only months away.

Work is a mess – a man-made mess – but I’m reluctant to go into the details just now. The upshot is that until the mess is resolved, I’m left with only half a job. That puts my position in peril, as I always suspected might happen. It would do me good to get out of the place, and if I am to progress, I must – but I’d prefer to do it on my terms. There’s a bit to play out yet.

I’m coming to the point where I have to make a call on which direction to take. Getting cancer gave me a mulligan, but that expires soon. Ironically, if not for cancer, I may not have faced the choice.

I have until about January, I figure. By then, I should be fit and well enough to fully commit to full-time work. My eye will be fixed, and perhaps other things also. It will be a new year and, with it, a new opportunity.

The question now, as always, is where does the opportunity lie? And what will please me? It’s something I have to start thinking about now, I figure, and begin preparations for. The next month will tell a tale.

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