Eating with my mouth shut

I eat the same stuff every day. I mix it up sometimes to make it more interesting, eating things in a different sequence from before maybe, and trying different flavours – but there’s no real variety.

The cornerstone of my diet is porridge, soup and scrambled eggs. In between, I eat fruit purees or jelly. I’ll make up a batch of sustagen or indulge myself with some chocolate mousse or rice pudding bought at the supermarket. I’ve taken to drinking Gatorade for the electrolytes.

I’ve got three different types of porridge in the pantry, to which I always add a dollop of butter. I would eat with cream before – I have to put on weight after all – until I discovered it’s even better with yoghurt. Most days, I’ll add some psyllium husk to it.

I’ve had friends make soup for me, and Donna ordered a batch delivered over the weekend. I’ve had pumpkin, tomato and basil, and mushroom soup so far. Tonight it will be cauliflower with Dijon mustard.

Then there are the scrambled eggs. I love eggs, particularly when it comes with toast, which it most definitely doesn’t at the moment. I make a creamy scramble to make for easier eating – lots of cream and butter. Much as I love scrambled eggs, it gets a bit tedious when it’s the same every day. Fortunately, you can trick eggs up pretty easy. So far, I’ve had scrambled eggs with truffle oil, black garlic, cheese and chives, chilli, and Sriracha sauce. Today I made curried scrambled eggs – curry powder mixed in with an Indian onion chutney for sweetness. Very good.

I’ve experimented, with mixed results, trying other things. For example, I made a mac and cheese mash, which wasn’t bad, which I then converted into a hash. I tried something similar with rice, with less success.

My friend JV has made me a couple of vegetable purees – cauliflower and pumpkin – which I’ve jazzed up my end by adding cheese sauce and a bit of spice, and with a touch of ginger and chilli. All my friends have more bland tastes than I do.

I’m hoping to get more ambitious with my eating, particularly as I need to build my strength, but it seems doomed.

Craving a bit of illicit flavour, I ate a big bag of Twisties over a few days last week. I chewed each twistie carefully, then swallowed the crumbs. I had no problem with the swallowing, but with a mouthful of stitches, there are plenty of nooks and crannies for food to lodge.

I’m sure I could eat more solid food, only I can’t open my mouth more than an inch, and my ability to chew is inhibited. I’ll get more movement as the stitches dissolve; the only problem then is that I’ll likely have a mouth full of mouth ulcers. Then, when I get over them, no tastebuds to enjoy my food. It’s pretty perverse, actually, as if some particularly nasty person has designed it that way.

Food is one of the great delights of my life, and I’m denied the pleasure of it for months on end – not to mention wine and cheese. Like most things currently, I’ve packed those things away in my mind. I’ll return to them when I’m better.

At least, right now, I have a little cheesecake a friend left for me – indulgent and melts in your mouth.

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