Hanging in there

It’s been a tough week. I’m either dopey and in a fair amount of pain or dopey with moderate pain. I’m never without pain, and I feel at least half doped all of the time. It feels like I’m at a critical point.

I have a theory that the painkillers I’ve been given actually exacerbate the pain (and which make me so foggy as well). I know it sounds counter-intuitive, but the circumstantial evidence is there.

I was in a fair bit of pain early last week after visiting the hospital and as a result of the treatment. By Thursday, that was improving, and by Friday/Saturday, the pain was down to a moderate and manageable level.

I also saw my GP last week, and he prescribed me heavy-duty painkillers to help with the pain. However, I found them pretty ineffective as a painkiller. The Nurofen I would take would nullify the pain, whereas this had a sedative effect. I would take it before going to bed but take others through the day.

The pain got markedly worse from Monday. So, I was bad, then I was okay, and then I got bad again, just when the symptoms should have been improving. The worsening pain coincided with me taking these painkillers. Correlation is not the same as causation, but in the absence of other evidence, the hypothesis is that they have an adverse effect on my condition.

I did some research yesterday and found that they shouldn’t be prescribed to anyone with pressure on the brain. That’s what I feel I have. As if my head is blocked up and the stress of it wears at the seams.

Unfortunately, I saw the GP again yesterday complaining about the pain and suggesting I needed a different painkiller. Instead, he gave me the same but in a double dose. The idea is that it slow-releases over a 12 hour period, rather than 6 hours. I hoped that might mean I get a night of undisturbed sleep.

So I took one yesterday at about 10.30, and by 3.30 I was in pain. I took a half-dose tablet, as suggested, then in the evening took a couple of Panadol. Before I went to bed, I took another of the 12-hour tablets to get me through the night.

Lying there in bed, this chain of events suddenly occurred to me. I’d called earlier in the day to see if I could get the specialist appointment and surgery pushed forward, but it wasn’t possible. The GP had suggested that maybe I get admitted to the hospital as an inpatient to manage the pain, but I’d rather not if they’re not going to treat me. And all the while, I was worried why it should get worse when it should be getting better. That was a concern.

Which is when I put it together. Things don’t happen by accident, and they don’t normally turn so quickly. There has to be a reason in my evidence-based world.

I may be wrong, it may be something else, but my best guess is that it’s the painkillers. I’ve stopped taking them now and will take a combo of Panadol and Nurofen to manage the pain. It’ll take a few days for the other painkiller to get out of my system. If I’ve got it figured right, I should start feeling better by about Monday and hopefully will have a much clearer head before then.

If I’ve got it wrong then I’ll be mighty pissed off.

I’m over it, but shit happens.

As an aside, just to make everything perfect, I got a call yesterday from the landlord that they planned to renovate and sell the property, and I have to be out in 65 days.

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