The deflating balloon

Back at work after a long weekend, a fresh coffee at my hand and a short week ahead. I feel kinda mellow. I had a pleasant, but uneventful few days watching a lot of sport, doing a bit of cooking, plus the usual daily shift of writing. The sport was excellent by and large – my team is flying, footy is entertaining, and in a tough year my tipping is great. The only down was the loss by Australia in the Champions Trophy, but I’ll come to that. Cooking was fine too, a hearty Bolognese and some chocolate brownies. As for the writing – well, not thrilled, but you have patches like that. Now back to work.

One of the things I got up to over the weekend was to update my LinkedIn profile. I also did a bit of thinking about my professional future, including the possibility of returning to freelance consulting. That’s my preferred option for so many reasons, but it’s the riskiest, and it’s pretty tough too. As a part of that I sent off an email to the closest thing I have to a consulting mentor, who has a soft spot for my eccentric ways.

Back at work the guy across from me muttered something, then showed his phone to me. It displayed an acknowledgement for a role he had applied for at Telstra. Change is in the air.

I don’t know what will happen to me, and the odds are that I’ll continue on here for a while yet. I don’t feel my customary urgency though, not at the moment anyway. That’s one of the qualities I normally bring to my job. I push things through. I don’t take no for an answer. I make things happen. It’s the reputation I made 15 years ago and I take pride in that, but I don’t feel it now. It’s probably temporary, but it’s significant. I feel as if the air is slowly being let out of the balloon – and it’s not just me. Through carelessness it’s happening about me, others, impatient and disillusioned with the environment have come to the same place I am.

I’m not concerned about that right now. As I say, I feel mellow. It’s a short week and I have things to do that I’ll methodically work through, but I won’t be reaching. I’ve now got my eyes on something beyond all this.

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