Doubting H

It seems appropriate to be listening to Latin music while the Rio Olympics are on. It’s an eclectic mix, and much of it is Bossa Nova and Brazilian jazz. Great stuff, and a favourite playlist for intimate encounters.There’s nothing intimate about what I’m doing now. I’m at work, driving through the pile of jobs, one earbud in, the other free to listen for anyone calling my name.

I used to be disdainful of listening to music at work. I was much more a purist then. To me it indicated a lack of commitment, and a form of cheating. I was right, which is why I’m now listening to music while I’m working. The work is not challenging enough for the distraction to be an issue.

I was informed yesterday that processing of my application for the role here would be delayed because the HR person responsible has taken leave. It seemed hardly surprising somehow. Applications closed Friday. She’s gone for the next two weeks. Frustrating, but deal with it.

The other part of that conversation was about sourcing other opportunities here because they ‘know what you’re capable of’. In other words, they’re willing to actively advocate for me – in theory anyway. The first part of that is with meeting with the manager here to discuss. That’s fine, but until it happens I’m a sceptic.

I’m sorry if I sound like a doubting Thomas, but I’ve learnt not to expect or hope too much. I dislike it, but it’s prudent. I get a lot of phone calls and emails and seemingly great opportunities presented to me, only for every single one of them to come up zilch. More often than not they just peter out, disappear. One day they’re as keen as mustard, a day later they’re not answering calls.

It’s the nature of the market these days – lots of maybe jobs that don’t eventuate, or which get filled internally, or transmogrify into something different, or are put on perpetual hold. It’s the nature of the industry too, which is essentially insincere and opportunistic.

It may turn out different here, but this time I have to deal with plain old human apathy and incompetence. That’s why I doubt, and sadly it’s the only sensible way to be.



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