Funny, I came across this post of nearly 3 years ago by chance. It made for interesting reading. Much of what I wondered at then, or queried, I now know, and in some ways find that my worst fears were justified. That’s not what I take from it though.
More important to me in this moment are the words I wrote then about purpose, intent, authenticity. There is much to regret in recent years, but little I can really scold myself for. To read this now comes as an affirmation of inner belief, and a reminder that things change, life changes, and in the long run the peaks and troughs even out. Nothing is ever done, and nor am I.

Hieronymous the Anonymous

During another night of odd dreams I felt at one juncture a sense of alarm. I was not dreaming at the time, and was close to being fully awake. From nowhere I felt a sense of doubt. Even half asleep I knew what it was about.

I have embarked on this risky course of going it alone. There is no certainty, no guarantee that it will be a success. I have known that all along but have put it to one side. It was not something worth considering. Instead I looked ahead, the Nietzschean dictum that “you ought to become who you are” my inspiration.

It was not wrong to doubt though. It was, and I guess is, perfectly understandable. Even as I write this I can feel a small part of that in me. I don’t have a crystal ball, I don’t know how things will turn out. And…

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